I’m Not Sure Why I Did This

He’s laying half on me, there are tight clips on both nipples, my clit and my tongue. He shakes them to make them hurt more. Except the one on my tongue; I think that’s there because of my smart mouth.

Thursday, finally I get to be with my Maestro. I long to be with Him, I need to be in His arms, receive His sensuous kisses, feel Him pull my head back with my hair, exposing my neck for Him to bite, I need to have Him take me, to submit to Him, I long for Him. He says I have taunted Him and built His desire, and because of that this will be all about His pleasure. Selfish, Dommish. I want to give that to Him.

He admires what I wore for Him today, having me turn around and model it for Him, He finds it appealing. Kissing me deeply, my breath is jagged, I’ve waited so long for this. Biting my neck, working around the collar I’m wearing, I’m melting. He tells me to lay on the bed and finger myself, He’s busy with His phone, summoning fun I imagine. Joining me on the bed He tells me to suck His cock, I get His cock hard and He’s fucking me. A knock at the door, He get’s up to answer, it’s the young slave boy from last time. He works the slave, has him pleasure me, has him suck His cock. Another knock at the door, its the male sub. Sucking, licking, kissing, fucking, cumming. The slave is dismissed, the sub is sucking His cock, we’re kissing, the beast is emerging. I dismiss the sub. Now it’s me and the beast.

The beast is biting, kissing, raging. He grabs a crop and hits me with it a few times. I suck His cock, He’s kissing me. And here, I don’t know what came over me, I don’t know what possessed me to have to do this. The exact sequence of events has faded before I can put it down in words, I’ll do my best. I tell Him I am His. I untangle myself from Him and get up from the bed. He asks me where I’m going. I reach into the toy bag and bring out and handful of paddles and set them on the table, I tell Him to use me. He says I have proven to Him that He owns me, I look Him in the eyes and tell Him that I need Him to prove it to me. Brief confusion, then the beast is in His face. He tells me to get on the bed, I do with my ass offered to Him. I am beaten to the point of having to use the safe word, yellow. He continues with the crop, clips, biting, pain, tears. Abruptly He stops, He hypnotizes me. It takes longer than usual to bring me down. He fucks me, cumming several times, saving His final, enormous climax for my mouth. We lay together briefly, then He showers and leaves.

What made me do this? Was I trying to ensure He got the release that (I thought) He needed? The last time He had beaten me He said He had taken my smart remark as an invitation o unleashed upon me. Perhaps that’s what I was doing here, to serve Him? Was it something to do with having been with the other Dom? Is my dominant side getting too strong? I don’t know, I really just don’t know.

This is worth 3 fucks, bringing my total to 59.


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